Oh Hi! You’re on the wrong blog.

Hi there! John-Michael tuning in with the first blog post this blog received in over… nine years? Wow, time flies.

Anyhow, this hasn’t been my main blog for a while. You can find my main blog by going to JMGariepy.com. All the article that are here have been reproduced there, so you’re not missing out on anything (except nine years plus worth of posts.)

If you’re interested in my video series that explores watching movies with my local community, then instead feel free to check out PopcornRoulette.org.

If you think the idea of a medical audio drama based on an award winning manga sounds great, then you should check out SayHelloToBlackJack.com.

Or if you’re interested in my first book, which combines board game history with a bathroom reader, then checking out the landing page to Winning Streak: Tales and Trivia of the 40 Most Popular Board Games over at WinningStreakBook.com.

Or maybe you just would prefer to follow me? You can find me on twitter as jm_gariepy. Or if you want to subscribe to my Popcorn Roulette feed on Youtube, you can click here to do just that.

~

Sooner or later, I’m going to have to sunset my original blog page, but I just have a hard time bringing myself to do it. Writing weekly on this blog was the start of every project I’ve ever completed, and every project I’m wrapped up in today. Thank you for reading this. I would have done none of this without you.

Yer Mummy’s so fat…

After I posted Dungeons and Dragons Random Encounters: Level 21, I left a link on Facebook and Google+ about how awesome Giant Mummies are.  That lead to this comment:

Robert Henderson:  Giant mummys, leading cause of “your momma so fat” jokes in DnD circles…

This, of course, lead to a litany of ‘Yer Mummy’ jokes.  I’d hate to think that someday you would die a sad and lonely life, and you would never get the chance to read a bunch of bad mummy jokes, so I decided to do some editing and turned the obese mummies on you.  Enjoy.

• John-Michael Gariepy: Yer Mummy’s so fat, Johnson and Johnson took one look at her and sold their business.
• Robert Henderson: Yer Mummy’s so old, scientists carbon date her at around 7000 B.C.
• JMG: Yer Mummy’s so fat, there’s an exhibit for her in the Museum of Natural History: Cairo and the Museum of Natural History: Alexandria.
• RH: Yer Mummy’s so fat that the Great Pyramid were designed to be scale models of her bunions.
• Ron Charette: Yer Mummy’s so fat, her bandages are made of Lycra.
• JMG: Yer Mummy’s so old that when Atum wished to mate with Nu in order to create The Earth and The Sky, he asked your mummy’s permission first.
• RH: Yer Mummy’s so fat she had her internal organs removed to make room for food.
• RH: Yer Mummy’s so fat, the only way she can fit through doors is to “Walk Like an Egyptian.”
• RC: Your Mummy’s so stupid, she thought “denial” was a clever way to say “The Nile”.
• JMG: Yer Mummy only takes one bath a year. It’s called “The Flood Season”.
• RH: Yer Mummy’s so fat, five thousand slaves died weaving her bandages.
• JMG: Yer Mummy’s so fat that after she visited to The Great Bath, they renamed it “The Great Trampoline”.
• RH: Your Mummy’s so dumb, she couldn’t spell “bird” in hieroglyphs.
• JMG: Yer Mummy’s so ugly, when Napoleon ordered his men to fire on The Sphinx for target practice, they shot off yer mummy’s nose.
• RH: Your Mummy’s so fat she used to use The Nile River Basin as a Slip and Slide.
• JMG: Yer Mummy’s so stupid that when she was told her ancestors would someday be Greek, she responded “My ancestors will be a salad dressing?”
• RC: Your mummy’s so stupid that when Ray told her he was a god, she believed him.
• JMG: Yer mummy’s so lonely because you never call her. Why don’t you call yer mummy, Ron? All alone in that big pyramid of hers… what kind of eunuch are you?
• RC: Yer mummy’s a eunuch.